डाक्टर साहब बढ़ते वजन से परेशान हूँ

एक महिला अपने बबढ़ते हुए वजन से बहुत परेशान थी 

महिला डॉक्टर के पास गयी.... 

महिला- डाक्टर साहब मई अपने वबढ़ते वजन से बहुत परेशान हूँ 

कोई बेहतरीन इलाज बताईये?

डॉक्टर - अपनी गर्दन को दाएं बाएं घुमाइए 

महिला- ठीक डॉक्टर साहब पर किस समय ये करू?

डॉक्टर- जब भी कोई आपको खाने के लिए पूछे 

😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅

Vaastu Shastra

Husband : मेरी बीवी Vastu-Shastra पर बहुत ही ज्यादा विश्वास करती है !

Friend : Great, क्या वो उसका उपयोग भी करती है?

Husband : Oh-Yeah !!...जब हमारा झगड़ा होता है तब, वो कोई भी  'Vastu' उठा लेती है और फिर उसका उपयोग 'Shastra' की तरह करती है...!

😄😄😧😳😂😂😂😂😳😳

दो शराबी

😜😜😜😜

दो आदमी शराब के नशे में धुत्त होकर रेल की पटरियों के बीचों-बीच जा रहे थे....

पहला : हे भगवान, मैंने इतनी सीढ़ियां पहले कभी नहीं चढ़ीं

दूसरा: अरे सीढ़ियाँ तो ठीक हैं, मैं तो इस बात को लेकर हैरान हूं कि
हाथ से पकड़ने के लिए रेलिंग कितने नीचे लगी हुई हैं .....
😄😄😄😀😀

Beautiful Apsara Proposes To Ravan

A very beautiful Apsara proposes to Ravan-
Apsara: Will you marry me?
Ravan: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Apsara: Stupid... is mein hansne ke liye kya tha. Get lost.
Ravan (after she leaves):
Tells to all his ten heads..
*Kamino* !
*abse sirf beech wala sar hi 'HA' bolega*

Misleading Relations- Humorous Situation

Doctor Pagal Se: "Tum Pagal Kyun Huey??
Pagal: Mine Ek Vidhwa Se Shadi Ki, Uski Jawan Beti Se
Mere Baap Ne Shadi Ki... Yu Wo Meri Beti Meri Maa Ban Gayi.
Un Ke Ghar Beti Hui To Wo Meri Behan Hui Magar Main Uski
Nani Ka Pati Tha Is Liye Wo Meri Nawasi Bhi Hui.
Isi Tarah Mera Beta Apni Daadi Ka Bhai Ban Gaya
Or Main Apne Bete Ka Bhanja Aur Mera Baap Mera Damad Ban Gaya
Aur Mera Beta Apne Dada Ka Sala Ban Gaya Aur ..
Doctor: Abe Saale Chup Kar!! Kya Mujhe Bhi Pagal Kar Dega!!!!

Drunken Mouse and Cat argument

Janwaro Ki Party Me Chuha
4 Peg Laga Ke Tunn Tha
Billi- Aj Party Na Hoti To Mai Tujhe Khaa Jaati!!
Chuha- Chali Jaa Nahi To Log Kahenge
Ke Nashe Me Aurat Par Hath Utha Diya!!!!

Blood Group O+ve urgently Needed

Please Pass This Message To
All Your Friends
One Of My Friend
With Blood Group O+ve
Urgently Need Two Bottles
....
....
....
Of Kingfisher Strong (Chilled)

Difference Between Love & Arrange Marriage

What Is The Difference Between
Love Marriage And Arranged Marriage?
Love Marriage Is A Perfect Suicide
And Arranged Marriage Is The Planned.

True Professionalism

A Beggar Won 1 Million In Lottery
And He Bought A Gold Utensil
For Begging......
This Is Called True Professionalism.

My Wife Is Going To Jump Out

Husband To Hotel Manager
"Come Fast! My Wife Is
Going To Jump Out Of The
Window And Committing Suicide"
Manager: But What Can I Do?
Husband: Oye Idiot!! The Window
Is Not Opening!!!

A Dog Kissed A Mosquito

A Dog Kissed A Mosquito
Mosquito Dies Due To Rabies Next Day
And Dog Died Of Malaria.
This Is Called.....
Pyar Ke Side Effect!!

Laloo Goes To America

Laloo Goes To America
To Learn English Language
After Some Days George Bush
Calls To Rabri Devi And Says..
"E Sasura Angreji Nahi Seekh Sakat Hai!!

Stop Kissing And Save Pakistan

Kiss Is The Key Of Love
Love Is The Key Of Marriage
Marriage Is The Box Of Children
And Yhe Children Are The Problem Of Pakistan
So Stop Kissing And Save Pakistan!!

Class Rooms And Trains Similarity

Class Rooms And Trains Similarity:
First Two Benches Are Executive Coaches
Reserved For VIP's
Middle Two Are General Compartment
And Last Two Are Sleeper Class!

People Stick Their Noses In My Business

Abhishek: I Am Delighted When
People Stick Their Noses In My Business
John: Why? What Do You Do?
Abhishek: I Have A Company
Which Makes Tissue Papers!

Psychiatrist's receptionist comes

Psychiatrist's receptionist comes
And Says To The Doctor:
A Man Has Come And Says He
Can Make Himself Invisible?
Psychiatrist: Tell Him That
I Can't See Him Right Now!!

Patient: Doctor, Will I be Able To

Patient: Doctor, Will I be Able To
Play Piano After The Operation
Doctor; Yes You Can Play, No Problem!
Patient: That's Great! I Could Not Play It Before!

A Man Calls His Wife through idea Mobile

A Man Calls His Wife through idea Mobile
But The Call goes to Another Woman
They Loved And got Married,
Moral Of The Story- An !dea Can Change your Wife!

Husband To Buy Her A New Car

Wife Hints Her Husband To Buy Her A New Car
"Darling Can You Gift Me Something
That Goes 0 To 80 in 3 Seconds When I Am On It?
Santa Gifted Her A Weighing Machine

Ist Dog: I Am New In This Locality

Ist Dog: I Am New In This Locality
I Want To Meet The Leader Of Dogs
2nd Dog: Shh... Keep Quite
Cant You See Sardar Is Reading SMS?